Showing posts from 2015

Thanks Mom & Dad from your Birthday Girl

It is almost my 59th birthday.  I was born in Carrizozo, NM, delivered by Dr. Spencer, on April 30, 1956.  My parents lived in Hondo at the time, and that’s just what you did, you drove to the clinic in Carrizozo.  I don’t remember much of my early years, but know that we lived in Hondo, Carrizozo, Alamogordo, and Ruidoso.
My earliest childhood memories are when we lived at Shier’s Trailer Park in Hollywood, NM, which is between Ruidoso & Ruidoso Downs. 
When I was about 6 or 7 we moved into a home that was next-door to where my Daddy worked at C & L Lumber.  We lived there until I was a sophomore in high school.
In 1972 we moved to where I currently live on Colorado Lane in Ruidoso Downs, NM.
I have three sisters and one brother.  Irene, Ida, Albert & Lynette.  They are amazing.  We learned about love & family from two of the best teachers.  We learned about God and how to pray.
I have tried to pass all the things they taught me to my own children.  Luke, Robert, Jessica…
Death changes everything!  Time changes nothing…. I still miss the sound of your voice, the wisdom in your advice, the stories of your life and just being in your presence.  So No, time changes nothing, I miss you as much today as I did the day you died.  I just miss you!

From one of my readings this morning: I have seen your heart, your heaviness, your tears and I have said it is enough. I am removing many obstacles from your pathway at this time, setting your feet on solid ground. There is not an issue of lack. You have lifted your hearts to Me and said, “I know My God will make a way”. My child, I made the way even before you asked. Rejoice! I have opened and am opening doors that no one can take credit for. I am bringing back to your heart a stability in Me. The time of testing has been hard and the enemy meant it for your harm. But I have been here all the time. For this is a pathway chosen especially for you. This is the season of releasing that knowledge. Look to the midnight hour for a release of Heavenly wisdom, even a downpour from Heaven to be released. This is to bring freshness to you and the enemy will be put to flight.  Sorrow will no more be your portion. The time of birthing has ended and this is the season to rejoice over the newness …
You never know where life is going to take you.  The last time I was here, was just a few days after my 58th birthday.  Life seemed "normal" then.
     Although my boyfriend and my sister-in-law had just lost someone so important in their lives, I believed that I could help them both through their grief.  Little did I know, that I was only preparing myself for some of the hardest things I was about to encounter.  All the great advice I gave them, all the positive things I knew to say, all of those things escape me now.
     On August 11, 2014 the first man that I ever loved passed away.  My Daddy.  Life has been so difficult with him gone and I had so many questions for God.  All the whys just didn't seem to get answered.
     Then 3 days before Christmas, on December 22, 2014, the most horrible tragedy happened.  My son called me to tell me he had found his son, my 17 year old grandson dead.  
    The grief I have felt since that day, is indescribable.  On top of grieving f…